Trying to preserve your sanity in a world that has completely gone mad whilst juggling your fear for the debilitating stigmas that mental illnesses so often entail, I feel must be one of the most curved balls life can throw at you and certainly one I try to dodge rather than catch.
I still recall the accusatory indications, like the appalling experience I had a lifetime ago when I received not one but forty seven phone calls in a row from my eldest sister, again and again affirming I was her brother and she consequently loved me but she was ordered by God not to ever talk to me again or relate to me in any other way, because, you know, I was cuckoo. The fact that she was admitted herself shortly afterwards only partly reassured me.
Or the pitiful but highly effective tone a former friend used to talk about people she became at odds with to pare down her own guilt, spreading the narrative he or she “was not well, so sad”, a trick she learned from her mother who, being a lifelong psychiatric nurse, had plenty of inside information to scatter around.
I realize there’s a bitter aftertaste involved in complaining about any decline of moral sanity, associated with repeatedly suggesting a superior past actually gloomed by memory, a proverbial old age ailment, so I probably shouldn’t even adduce my own lucidness becoming severely damaged by the now fashionable and openly executed strategy of accusing one’s competitor of one’s own lying and cheating, on whatever scale those atrocities have taken place. Do I even loosely trust that trends like these, causing widely spread chaos and confusion, are transient and righteousness will spontaneously prevail?
It’s a mad, mad world wherein I have to keep reminding myself that sanity is a man-made concept anyway and my thoughts are solely based on my private perceptions, no more no less.
As the warm autumn winds starts casting their shadows forward, slowly introducing browns and reds to Les Pierres’ tenacious pinks and purples, I watch the filberts fall from their shrubs, unrestrained by stealing squirrels for a change and surprisingly undamaged by worms. This nut job has yet another mind enriching nut job to tackle today.
In a world that has completely gone mad
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